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He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, ‘I saw that ... You didn’t put any money in the poor box!’ The Irishman replied, ‘Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that’s the same as putting it in!’Lemon Squeeze There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, ‘Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.’ The priest said, ‘Confess your sins and be forgiven.’ The young woman said, ‘Last night my boyfriend made passionate love to me seven times.’ The priest thought long and hard and then said, ‘Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice.’ The young woman asked, ‘Will this cleanse me of my sins?’ The priest said, ‘No, but it will wipe that smile off of your face.’Catholic Dog Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, ‘Father,. Can it really be? But the more she considers everything, she is becoming convinced; she is also pregnant. And, with that realization, she immediately knows that has to be reason for her being sick and weakened. And, she also knows it has to be Rayner’s. Their fucking from that first night became loving, making love to each other. Despite her continued mating with Dog, their nights were filled with loving each other’s bodies and … yes, their very souls. Leaving her was one of the hardest things he had had to do, but he could divert attention from her escape. Her hands are on her early baby belly, just a bump now, and she smiles. That is when she hears a crashing behind her, turning in fright, but seeing Dog wagging his tail wildly … Rayner!She quickly tried to get up, but moaned as she tried using muscles that hadn’t been used for some days. “Sarah, stay down and rest.”She held out her arms to him, “No, please, I’ve been down too long and … I want to hold you.”He helped her up to her.
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